Sebahate J. Shala
THERE is always something good coming out of something bad. The good thing that came out of this crisis is turning to each other. To our families. To our beloved. To our friends. To the forgotten people. To the forgotten things. To simple things we neglected and unappreciated. To simple life we ignored and underestimated. We turned to ourselves. And, finally, we let the planet Earth breathe.
Isolation and social distance have become a new normalcy. As a result, people have found new, creative ways of communication. Clapping. Singing. Chanting. Cheering. Waving their hands. Chatting through videos. Going in a virtual date. Girls night out. Every day at 10:20 AM, for example, my brother Doni, shows up at our nephews’ building, Peon and Liri, to say hello and wave hands with them. My little munchkins go out in their balcony and wave him back. Ritual lasts 5 minutes. Then, Doni goes back to do what he has to for the day. He has 85 minutes only—assigned from the Government as part of the restriction measures. Use it for good!
To help people be together while physically apart, Facebook launched a Messenger apps enabling group video calls and messages. Mimi Zhu, a queer Chinese-Australian-Brooklyn-based artist created a Communion group, encouraging people to connect through virtual communication, streaming and broadcasting, calling loved ones, writing virtual love letters, solidarizing. Pop singer Britney Spears supported the cause, sharing Zhu’s message on Instagram: “We will feed each other, re-distribute wealth, strike. Communion moves beyond walls.” Heart in the Window and A World of Hearts invite their members to decorate their windows with cut out hearts. In Kosovo, people share favorite books and songs, as well as old pictures of themselves. A sense of being together while alone.
I have changed a lot, for good. I have become a socializer. I was an asocial person before. Phone conversation, a rare thing, now has become a routine. In New York, talking on the phone is a LUXURY we can’t AFFORD. Because of dynamism and individualism. We are given this luxury now. I communicate with a number of friends and colleagues, Albanians and Americans, in New York and D.C., and back home in Kosovo. We talk every day, share our insights, news articles and videos, offer help and discuss issues regarding government programs. We try to avoid conversation on Covid-19.
I Am Grateful to have them in my life. I Am Forever Thankful to them for taking care of me during this difficult time, reaching out and checking on me every day and offering their help about whatever, knowing that I’m alone here. I am forever thankful for calling, texting and encouraging me to write at a time when I wasn’t feeling well physically and emotionally, at a moment when I was scared that I might have contracted the virus due to some symptoms I showed, and when I was terrified figuring out I was exposed to the virus. Thanks to my family, especially to my dad. Thanks to my girlfriend, Elle, for calling me during those days and ever since this crisis unfolded. I Am Forever Thankful to All of Them.
In order to connect, solidarize and be informed on the ongoing crisis and political developments in Kosovo, I turned to social media, Facebook. I was more present, more engaging. I felt closer to my fellows. But while social media and Covid-19 crisis have helped others to unify, solidarize and love each other, in Kosovo, it has had the opposite effect. Politics and social media have polarized the society. People spread hate instead of love. They are divided rather than getting united. They offend instead of respecting each other. They don’t respect others’ right to freedom of expression. What I’ve seen during this time is hatred, division, offenses. How come Kosovo Albanians hate each other this much?! Where is this hate coming from? Why people spread negative energy? Maybe because we are a post-traumatic society, never psychologically treated. Yet, unjustifiable. I called for love against hate. I called for social and political unity. I called for help and respect toward each other.
My compatriots use this time to love each other. There will never be a time like this again to spent with each other and do things we couldn’t, a friend of mine says. Don’t take your family for granted. Cherish and appreciate time with them. Think that some people don’t have family, or others, like me, all what they want is to be with the family right now. As Prince EA says in a video: “Use this tragedy to understand that what we really ever had in this world is each other, to understand what’s important to us…tell someone you care for them, that you cherish and will always be there for them, and the only vaccine for the F-Virus and all other viruses is LOVE.” Another video expresses gratitude to Coronavirus “for making us appreciate the luxury of life…abundance of products, freedom, health…make use see simple things… reevaluate our lives…show unity, and finally make us understand that we are all connected.” Thank you, Coronavirus!
Mental Health Issues, Domestic Violence…
A FRIEND says she’s having anxiety and nightmares and is sleeping a lot. I, myself, moved from sleeplessness to apathy to sleeping to depression. I read news saying that people are experiencing a dip in mental well-being. Stress, depression and anxiety sparked as a result of social separation, isolation, uncertainty on the duration of pandemic, inconsistency and contradictory information on virus from authorities, fear of being infected, economic crisis, and uncertainty about the future. Millions of Americans lost jobs in the first three weeks. Unemployment surged at 20%. Worrying.
According to CDC, fear and anxiety about the disease can be overwhelming causing strong emotions. “Shortage of resources” and “imposition of unfamiliar public health measures that infringe on personal freedoms” are likely to increase emotional distress, psychiatry professors Betty Pfefferbaum and Carol S. North wrote in the New England Journal of Medicine. “Social distancing […] is especially taking toll on people who are isolated at home alone. Loneliness can be a big source of stress,” says Lisa Meredith, a senior behavioral scientist. Take breaks from news. Take care of your body. Take deep breaths. Meditate, exercise. Sleep a lot. Eat healthy and well-balanced meals. Do activities you enjoy. Connect with others. These are CDC recommendations. Apply them!
In Kosovo, domestic violence has increased. I suggested my sister, Besa, a psychologist, to voluntarily offer help to those who have mental issues. Same goes for others. There is a hotline in Kosovo police, too. Volunteering, altruism and solidarity tell a lot who you are as a person. Our good and humanity come into surface in extraordinary situations. In ordinary situations, we all are normal. We should go beyond ourselves to help others. Communication is key. Call someone. Send a text. Write a letter. Say I Love You. Talk to someone about your health issues. Seek help. Don’t be ashamed. We are humans. We are vulnerable. We have mental problems.
Next: Diary in the Time of Coronavirus COVID-19: Falling in Love, in Quarantine (V)
War and Peace 